I'm an ass

I try not to be, but sometimes it just happens. There are a few things on my mind lately and I'll try to get to each of them over the next few days, but first the latest thing that bugs me. It seems that quite a few people that I know have decided to start blogging. That's very cool. I really like hearing all about the mundane and insane and deeply intense and personal things that my good friends have shared. However, sometimes I read things posted by people I've known for years and wonder if I really know them. Sometimes this is a sad thing, but most of the time it's awesome that my friends are still surprising me and we're still changing and growing as people. I love it. But today I had one of those "I don't really know this person" moments and it was not the good kind. I realized I'm an ass. I hope that by confessing my ass-ness and resolving to pull my head out and keep it out that I might find some forgiveness. You may have read the blog of my good friend Psycho. His wife, Sign Foo, just started her own blog recently and I spent some time this morning skimming through it. I was struck by how very smart and articulate she is. Now, I knew this. If you were to ask me I'd say yes, she is a very smart person. But since she's deaf, she doesn't come off as articulate as you or I might like to think that we sound. On paper, or in a blog, it's all the same. We're all playing on a level field. So as I was reading through I realized that my surprise at finding her so expressive and smart was actually disturbing. You see, I realized that I'm an ass who just judges by what I see or hear and not by what is really there. Mostly this was a rude awakening because she and I read some of the same kinds of books and we've talked about them and I know she's insightful and intelligent. She's very well read. But, because it takes more work to follow her in a conversation, I discount it somewhat. I knew better and I still caught myself being stupid, patronizing and perhaps condescending. See? I'm an ass. Foo, I'm sorry. I know it can be hard to fight prejudice and bigotry. Especially when people don't even know they have it. I will most definitely try to be more respectful and less of an ass. Please forgive me so we can talk more about the books we read and I can benefit from your wonderful insight and opinion.